Christmas Text Jokes

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any “INDAY” text jokes lately?

so far, i have the text jokes about Inday regarding her career at the call center, asking for permission for her Christmas vacation, being held up at gunpoint, yadda yadda, you get my drift, hehe…

A little girl was asked what forgiveness is..

she whole-heartedly answered:

“it is the fragrance that flowers give when they are crushed..”

the little girl grew into a fine woman named Inday!

grabe bata palang si inday promising na!

*****

Amo: mula ngayon, walang magsasalita ng ingles. Ang sinumang magpapadugo ng ilong ko at sa mga anak ko, palalayasin sa pamamahay na to! Klaro ba?

Inday: Ang mga namutawi sa inyong mga labi ay mataman ko pong iniimbak sa sulok ng aking balintataw, sa kaibuturan ng aking puso, gungunamgunamin, aariing salik ng aba at payak kong kabatiran. Ttatalikdan ang matayog at palalong banyagang wika, manapay kakalingain, bibigkasin at sakdal timyas na sasambiting ng aking sangkalooban.

*whew*

*****

We would like ti invite you as we take our vows and affirm our special promise to cherish each other, our mutual love, respect and fidelity before God and man as husband and wife on Saturday 6pm at Sanctuario de San Antonio, McKinley Road, Forbes Park, Makati.

Reception will follow at the Manila Peninsula Grand Ballroom.

R.S.V.P.

Attire: Formal

“Dodong and Ederlyn Nuptial”

Inday: Paksyet ka Dodong! How could you?! Arrgghhh!

*****

Please pray for the quick recovery of Inday. She’s currently in the ICU because of excessive nose bleeding which she had while accompanying junior in his school’s Linggo ng Wika Celebration. Please pass this to all whose lives, like mine, have been touched by Inday.

*****

Sa resto;

waiter: ano po oder nila maa?

Amo: yung friend chicken meal na lang. ikaw inday, ano sayo>

Inday: I would like to partake of a dish of sauteed pork and chicken, boiled in thick essence of soy an cane extracts, ith copious amounts of garlic, onion and laurel, sprinkled generously with line spices and served witha generous helping of root crop and a helping of rice.

Amo: iho, adobo rice daw.

*****

Dear sir/mada:

Attached herewith is a list of proposed acquisition in line with my proposal to upgrade your household facilities. I have already made initial survey of current market prices. Note however that prices could vary depending on the prevailing exchange rate and aggregate supple and demand which we also monitor on an hourly basis.

- si inday, nagpapaalam para mamalengke

*****

Much as I want to indulge in the proliferation of such indecent and malicious information, I want to lift the stigma and alleviate society’s perception of the profession..

- inday, tumatangging makipagtsismisan sa saktulong sa kabilang bahay XD

Another great place to shop for Christmas Text Jokes products is Amazon. They have more than just books!

The Christmas I Love $6.29 All products are BRAND NEW and factory sealed. Fast shipping and 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed….

I BEAT ANOREXIA Logo Kids T Shirt 2T thru Youth XL Great looking 100% cotton shirt. Please refer to our sizing chart for measurements.This design also available as a men’s or women’s tee shirt, and a men’s hoodie and sweat shirt in our other amazon.com listings….

Dumb White Husband vs. The Grocery Store (A Short Story) $0.99 John is a dumb white husband. That is to say that he loves and cares for his family, is successful in his career, popular around the neighborhood, can dress himself (often without injury) and is capable of reasonable thought. Demographically, however, he functions like a 4-year-old that can’t quite master the intricacies of the potty. It isn’t his fault. He studied hard and got a college degree. H…

Dumb White Husband vs. Santa (A Short Story) Erik has planned the perfect Christmas for his family. The plan is foolproof, bulletproof and flame retardant. Nothing can undo the hours of planning and preparation. Nothing except maybe odd-shaped packages, ill-timed fruitcakes or an errant neighborhood Santa Claus.About the Dumb White Husband series: He’s the butt of every joke, the fool in every commercial-the Dumb White Husband is corporate A…

Lovely, Raspberry: Poems $8.73 “Aaron Belz’s poetry reminds us that poetry should be bright, friendly, surprising, and totally committed to everything but itself. Reading him is like dreaming of a summer vacation and then taking it.” —John Ashbery “Aaron Belz writes in the tradition of Richard Brautigan, never afraid to let the awkward intensity of address and visual snap of juxtapostion hijack the poem’s more solemn dutie…